We made a list of things that we didn’t like about ourselves and number one was that we’re too negative. We wrote our name plus his name in a heart with an arrow going through it and the arrow said “hopefully.” We quickly learned that shaving our balls for the first time was like Pringles; once we started, it was hard to stop. We stole our crush’s schedule from the principal’s office and made an interactive map with possible intersections marked in pink and purple. We were forced to keep a workbook about the holy sacraments. We created a new Harry Potter character, an emerald-eyed American transfer student named Juniper, who happened to share a lot of our own characteristics. We mourned that Brendan taught us what a gerund was, but not about love. We were saving up for car insurance, a leather jacket, and a fun hat. We described our dream guy as being 175 lbs, able to bench press 225, and having not much pit hair. We were upset at our mother for giving us a hard time about our pubic hair clogging the toilet. We wrote about our Guess jeans in our diary and included the ® for registered trademark. We had a notebook covered in inspiring quotes from Cher and General George Patton. We liked to listen to the sounds of our frog puppet, and chewing. We decided to just pretend all the time that we went to a really cool inner city school. We wrote Patrick a note and asked him if he had the internet. We thought we might be popular if we learned every word to “Pour Some Sugar On Me.” We got dressed and went downstairs to go on AIM. We saved our Harry Potter fan fiction in a Comic Sans manuscript until age 14, when we switched to Times New Roman. We played M.A.S.H. but didn’t know that “dwelling” meant house so our fate was to dwell in sickness in New Mexico. We knew that a 9:30 bedtime would take care of most of these problems. We decided to have a crush on Enrico the Republican but he liked our best friend instead. We didn’t have to dwell on the past because with Patrick we had a future. We knew there was really nothing we could do about this except grow up. We are CRINGE.
A friend of mine was going on about reverse washing her hair, and I was pretty skeptical, like I am about most alternative hair-washing schemes people tend to proselytize about: washing with apple cider vinegar, washing with baking soda, washing once a week, washing with conditioner, not washing it at all. I’ve tried all of these things, and you know what makes my hair look best? Washing it and conditioning it regularly, like every other day. I use sulfate-free and silicone-free products (usually Pureology, which is pricey but a $30 bottle lasts me for half a year), and since my hair gunk issue of 2009 I tend to go without styling product most of the time. I am a white girl. My hair is very thick, with a tendency for dry ends and an oily scalp. It used to be curly, but in the past year or so the curls have loosened and now I can wear it straight, wavy or curly, depending on the humidity/how lazy I’m feeling.
So I thought reverse washing would turn out to be another load of crap and my hair would laugh at it, but I tried it this morning and my hair has never looked or felt as good as it does right now. It is soft and shiny and even smells better! I feel compelled to share this gospel with you, the internet, because if there’s one thing the internet likes to talk about it’s lip balm, and if there’s another thing the internet likes to talk about, it’s hair.
My two hobbies combined!
'Mericans! My lovely pal Elize - the super talented photographer - is taking her Small Town Girl project back to your fair shores, and she’s looking for… small town girls!
In her words:
"Almost exactly a year ago I posted this – a description of my Small Town Girl project and a…
hallmarks of a dud -
this is a running list, please check back for updates. this isn’t really a list for like… shitty racists/abelists/misogynists/classists/homophobes or anything, just for the blandest kind of dope.
- does april fool’s jokes (‘hey guys i’m pregnant lolol’)
- calls m. night shyamalan ‘m. night…
- calls Wednesday “hump day”
- takes family photos all dressed in white on a beach
LISTEN CAREFULLY TO THE SOUND
Murdered out house for Seth
(Source: elegance-experience, via doseofwords)